How old do you feel?

We play this game sometimes. 

How old do you feel vs. how old are you?

My husband always responds the same - a strong 36. Depending on the day, I can be anywhere from 34-88. Yesterday, while waiting for my daughters to finish practice, I played the game with some other parents on the field. It was random and totally fun.

One mom said she was so happy to be 44 finally; another parent said she still thinks of herself as 18. She is tired of “adulting” all the time. I feel both of these sentiments deeply.

I remember finding one of my journals from high school not too long ago: I whistfully wrote that I felt 34 and totally out of place among my peers. Thinking back to the younger me, this makes sense. I have always been an old, sleepy soul.

Next week my eldest daughter graduates from middle school. Last week, I had my thirtieth middle school reunion - Go Pike 1995! But how is any of THAT possible? I am still 25. Friday, I went on a date and to a house party. A great Friday night for a young person!

Today, I spent the entire (and I mean entire) day at a field complex in the suburbs of Boston watching 7 condensed lacrosse games. I looked around at all the middle-aged parents walking around with their children and thought:

How is it possible that I am a parent here and not on the field playing?